Tuesday, February 6, 2007

Iran Wants a Nukular Program

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Tell me again why you don't think I can be President?

So Iran want's a nuclear program ay?
That falls right in line with my plan to solve the war in Iraq.
Get all of our troops the hell out of there, invite the entire delegation of Iranian leaders to Baghdad, I know, they won't just come to Baghdad, so we've got to convince them that they're going to get something, maybe a virgin or two and a half dozen goats.
Then we entice Hezzbullah, al kaida, taliban, to show up by telling them there's going to be a military surplus auction, maybe we bring in some of the junk tanks that the Israeli's have trashed on them, and some 50 cals, that are burnt out, throw in a few dud morter rounds and RPGs, and the way I figure it they'll come a runnin, all yelling yelllaahhh abdallaah and beating themselves with chains and crap, shooting off round after round from their junk AK47s and 9mms. That leads all coming back to earth some where, what the hell are they thinkin? If I'm not wrong, one of the principle laws of physics is what goes up must come down. I can see it now, some innocent retard of a camel hurder peacefuly hurding his flock to the tigris for a drink, when thwap, a chunk of lead out of nowhere comes in the top oh his head and out his bung hole. (not sure whether bung hole is one word or two?, so I,m going to err on the side of volume, sort of like when we had to write a 1500 word paper for school). I can see it now, the bidding will be fast and furious, nobody wants to be short of crap to create death and destruction with. Let Mugtada and his Madhi Army play around with their IEDs and car bombs, these guy's are thinking they're getting some heavy duty shit.
I know, your probably thinking, what's the plan?
Well I'm getting to it.
Now pay close attention, here's the plan, we get all these radical assholes in Baghdad, and drop a nuclear bomb right smack in the middle.
The way I see it we take care of several issues.
1) We show the Iranians just how bad a nuclear bomb can be.
2) We send a clear message to the rest of the nair do wells that we aint screwing around with them any longer.
And last but not least.,br> 3)We make Baghdad a lot easier to renovate.
Once the radiation levels return to acceptable levels, (and they will, I offer Hiroshima and Nagasaki as examples, both fine modern cities now, and what thanks do we get for that?) as I was saying, once the geiger counters stop melting, they can start from scratch without havein all the messy demolition of bombed out buildings, and un detonated ordinance to deal with.
Well there you have it in a nut shell.
As if this wasn't grounds enough to back me for President, in my next blog I will let you in on my plan for making higher education more affordable.
Until then, I'll quote a friend who writes a weekly column for a news paper.
If you can read my blogs, thank a teacher, if your reading them in english, thank a veteran.
Pray that our men and women come home safely, soon.

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